Caregiving

Attention Men: If a Woman You Love Has Breast Cancer, Get This Book

+ Pamela Friedman

Guys, if a woman you love has breast cancer and you’re feeling lost and alone, there’s help. We know most of the books and support materials out there are targeted toward women, with good reason. However, male caregivers face their own challenges, and now, author, editor at “U.S. News and World Report”, and caregiver Marc Silver has written a book just for them. It’s called, Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (and Yourself) During Diagnosis, Treatment, and Beyond.

In 2001, Marc’s wife, Marsha, was diagnosed with breast cancer. Like most people, he didn’t know what to do. He looked for resources that would help, but found nothing that spoke to the unique perspective of a male caregiver. So he decided to write his own book. According to “Publisher’s Weekly,” Marc helps men weed through the confusion and anxiety of breast cancer with practical tips on what to do and what not to do, gives examples of how to best help a loved one, explains different types of treatments, and even explores ways for finding intimacy after mastectomy.

“I was contacted by Mark Silver…last year,” says Frank Sadowski, “and interviewed extensively about my own experiences…I only wish this book existed two years ago when my wife of 23 years was diagnosed with breast cancer; it is an invaluable resource that informs men in an accurate, succinct fashion exactly what is likely to happen at each stage of the diagnosis and treatment process….it is told from the mouths of real breast cancer husbands with real, true-life stories.”

Marc’s own website on the book adds, “…newly published studies show that the support of a loved one can be critical when it comes to coping with the stress of treatments-and may even improve a patient’s survival odds. The problem is, the man typically hasn’t a clue how to be a good caregiver. And his instincts lead him in the wrong direction.”

Breast Cancer Husband provides a checklist of questions for doctors, tips on coping with the side effects of treatment, and guidance for breaking the news to the kids. It even goes so far as to cover terminal cancer, with insights from mental health experts on living with the idea that your loved one may soon be gone.

“No one should face breast cancer alone,” says Nancy G. Brinker, founder of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation.  “But how does a husband support his wife when he may be feeling frustrated, sad, and angry himself? Author Marc Silver fills an essential niche with his book…offering emotional support and practical advice to help men be compassionate caregivers.”

“Silver’s prose is funny, tender, and filled with rock-solid advice,” says the Library Journal. “Highly recommended.”

Breast Cancer Husband is available at Amazon.com.

Have you read Marc Silver’s book? Let us know what you think.

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